Got Game? How to get real dating skills!

By Dean G. Kennedy

Let’s face it guys! Like the thousands of other useless dating books out there, we could bore you with generalities or give you a laundry list of worthless pick-up lines. But you would soon discover that your cash would have been better spent on a bad date. Right? That’s why our Zen System is not about cheap tricks. It’s all about real dating skills! You need game! You need a “rap”! After all, a cheesy pick-up line may help you initiate a conversation with a hot woman, but where do you go from here? How do you keep the conversation interesting? When and how do you ask for her phone number? What do you do on the first date?

You are ready for our Zen System, if you agree with us that dating is a skill. You can become an absolute master and date almost any beautiful woman you want, if you acknowledge a few simple principles:

Recognize that developing real dating skills requires a 360° approach. Take a 30-year-old, beat-up Volkswagen Beetle with a faulty engine, worn-out breaks, flat tires and striped gears. Even if you replace the engine with the finest Ferrari engine available, the Beetle won’t run because you haven’t corrected all of the other problems. Moreover, the Ferrari engine will not run properly in a VW Beetle. That’s obvious, don’t you think? The same principle applies to men in a dating context. Yet, you wouldn’t believe how many guys see their weakness as falling into one or two categories – which they may be willing to address – while completely ignoring other equally critical areas. For example, a $3,000 Armani-suit may greatly improve your appearance, but it won’t give you more self-confidence, help you entertain and captivate your date, or make you a better lover. The suit won’t do you that much good if you don’t improve the whole package. An Olympic runner might be in amazing physical condition, but he can’t run a marathon without track shoes. We’ll make sure you have the proper equipment.

You have to develop your own distinct game. We recognize that no two men are the same; there is no one-size-fits-all approach to dating. For example, a George Clooney-type of macho approach would not work for Mike Meyers (“Austin Powers”) or Ben Stiller (“Something About Mary”). Any of these guys would have tremendous success with women, even if they were not famous. George is drop-dead gorgeous. Mike Myers and Ben Stiller are hilariously funny. But clearly they have unique and different personalities and each one has developed his own effective style. You don’t have to be handsome like George Clooney, and you don’t necessarily have to be funny like Mike Myers. This principal applies to each of us. You can develop an amazingly effective style, but it must be within your character. If you’re an introverted and genuinely nice guy, turning yourself into a macho dude with cheesy pick-up lines will not work for you. It will feel unnatural and appear awkward. If anything, it will hurt your chances with women.

Let’s drive this point home. Think of the ultimate sports car, a Ferrari, and the ultimate luxury car, a Rolls Royce. Which one is superior? Neither. They are both tremendous vehicles with the ability to attract buyers willing to pay a small fortune for them. But, you cannot race a Rolls through a winding turn in the mountains. And you cannot take a relaxing drive in the country with your 3 friends in a Ferrari. It would be futile and counter-productive to make design changes to the Rolls to make it more like a Ferrari, and vice versa. To do so would be to defeat the qualities and allure that each of these vehicles possess. This metaphor applies to dating: different types of women are attracted to different kinds of men. Some like a suave refined gentleman; others prefer the growl of horsepower. You don’t have to be one or the other to succeed. But, you need to have a distinct style of your own that will differentiate your from the competition. You don’t have to change who you are, in fact you shouldn’t. Instead we will help you discover, augment, and showcase your strengths, while identifying and overcoming your weaknesses.

It’s all about execution. Theory is worthless without execution. Reading, learning, thinking, and self-evaluation are important elements in your development. However, if you don’t get out there and try, you will never, ever succeed. All the theory in the world gets you nowhere. It’s a great idea to develop a plan of action, but by itself that’s not enough. You need to practice and execute your strategies in the real world to see what actually works out there. For example, you can read and study the finest textbook on how to play baseball, but until you actually swing a real bat you will get nowhere. Likewise, you can read about dating, but the key is putting theory into practice. The “Zen Secrets of Dating” is not short on theory, but it’s really all about execution.

Why don’t we try? Because we are afraid of failing. But the most successful people in any field have developed a strategy to deal with “failure.” Think about this metaphor – you are “Mr. October,” “Mr. ‘Clutch.’” You step to the plate with tens of thousands of screaming fans, flashbulbs popping, millions of viewers on television. Bases are loaded, two outs, bottom of the ninth inning and the coach calls for a “pinch hitter” – you! You step to the plate, you are Reggie Jackson – the hall of fame unparalleled clutch hitter, best man in the world in this situation.

The count is now 3 and 2. If you were Reggie, if we put you in his shoes at that moment – come on, you would be freaked out. You would be thinking “what if I strike out” on national television in front of everyone. The pitch comes in, you take a huge swing, and a miss. Now what? If it were us, we would hang up our shoes. We would be too freaked to go out there again in the same situation. We will show you how to deal with this when we redefine failure.

Until you get to that chapter, just remember this: do you know who has the most strike-outs in major league baseball history, by far? That’s right – Reggie Jackson. Develop a plan to deal with set-backs and don’t let it stand in the way of you trying your best.

Here’s where our Zen System starts. Let’s explore together everything you need to know to date any beautiful woman you desire!